What does it mean to be “attuned” and why does it matter in relationships? Being “attuned” to your marriage is when you are aware, receptive to, and familiar with your partner. You know his/her needs and how to meet them. You know when your partner is struggling emotionally and how to help show love and support. You know what your partner likes and dislikes. There are many ways in which being “tuned in” to your relationship can be beneficial to both of you. Having a partner who is aware of and familiar with you and responds well to your needs creates a sense of trust, care, and emotional safety. These are very important in having a strong and healthy relationship.
Dr. John Gottman created an acronym “ATTUNE” to help individuals and couples be better at developing the skill of being attuned to each other:
- Awareness of your partner’s emotion;
- Turning toward the emotion;
- Tolerance of two different viewpoints;
- trying to Understand your partner;
- Non-defensive responses to your partner;
- and responding with Empathy.
If you are interested in finding out more about how to become better able to “tune in” to your partner, please read the following article:
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